I Wonder

Many a night I sit and wonder
Longing for the days of dolls
and stories of Once upon a time and Happily ever after
Days spent chasing butterflies
and planning grand tea parties
at which my favorite teddy bear would be the guest of honor
But now as I sit in my room late at night
I look at the textbooks that tell not of the fairies
and magick that I once knew,
but of bloody wars long past
I rais e my eyes to the open window
and look at the stars
I soak up their glitter while listening to the wind and crickets
One single tear starts to roll down my cheek
and I know that many more are on their way
I wonder where he's at right now
If he ever longs for what he had and could have again
But I know that he doesn't
and I begin to move on
Someone new has come along to try and dry my tears
And once again I find myself wondering
Where is he right now
And though I know that he thinks of me
I wonder if the same smile that replaced my tears,
plays on his face and lights up his eyes as it does mine
I still long for the days when everything was simple
But my dolls are packed away in my old, pine chest,
the butterflies have all gone away to more open fields,
the tea set is cracked and the guest of honor worn,
and the fairy tales sit on the bookshelf collecting dust.
And I sit in my room late at night,
surrounded by textbooks that tell of wars long past,
looking out at the sea of stars
And I wonder